I'm alive!!!

I slowly become aware of my surroundings. I can't make anything out clearly as I'm pretty short-sighted and my glasses are back on the ward. I begin to remember... I've had an operation... I've been under... I must be on the high dependency (recovery) ward... hang-on a friggin' minute - if I'm thinking this I must be alive! The full realisation of the repressed fear of the operation hit's me and I notice that I am relieved to be here, the relief surprises me - this is bigger than I had let myself believe.

My mind is completely cloudy, but I am lucid. I explore my surroundings and try and make out some of the things around me, the ward the other beds. Nothing is sufficiently close to make out clearly even when closing my eyes to pinholes in an attempt to focus. [I once did this trying to read the menu board at my local Chinese restaurant, when I lived in Bristol - took quite a bit of explaining!] A nurse appears - but I can't really talk properly - tired and woozy. She does my 'obs' and then disappears. This happens quite a few times and then suddenly I recognise a face... it's Sarah. Not satisfied with a phone call, she has managed to blag her way into HDU (visitors not normally permitted) just to check that I am really alive. I don't remember much: She tells me it's 10pm; the operation was successful, but difficult due to the location of the polyp and took longer than expected (4 hours). We both have wet eyes - one of those beautiful moments I will never forget, to be tucked alongside first pint, marriage, children's births, etc.